This lot is closed for bidding. Bidding ended on 6/27/2019
Moe Howard autograph comedy sketch signed multiple times throughout, featuring The Three Stooges, circa 1960. Very lengthy manuscript spans six pages on three sheets, with dense writing referencing Curly Joe and also mentioning a sequel to the movie ''Pillow Talk''. The sketch starts with ''Music Colonel Boogey [sic]'', likely referencing the Colonel Bogey March, and then action and dialogue among the Three Stooges takes place, without reference to another actor or comedian, suggesting the piece might be for an episode of ''The Three Stooges Scrapbook'', which never aired, or a Three Stooges stage show. First sheet measures 8.5'' x 11; other sheets measure 8'' x 12.5''. Toning to pages, less so to the first page, and a few closed tears. Overall very good condition.
Manuscript reads,
"Music Colonel Boogey until Joe = Oh Hello (he
Bows) (Moe cracks him under head) Music (Back Again, sing tune until Joe's
Hello Hello etc waving hand in front of Moes face) (Moe smashes cigar in face)
Joe - says, Did you see that Larry he broke my cigar,) Larry, the McKelane Joe
yeah the good one (Joe Goes after Moe,)(Larry Holds him back) Joe, Let go I'll murder
him, I'll tear him apart etc, (Larry lets Joe go, but Joe keeps talking to Moe) Joe You're lucky
Larry's holding me, if Larry wasnt holding, boy would you get your's, youre lucky etc
(Joe notices Larry let him go) Joe, (to Larry) Hold on boy, you want to get me killing
after all I'm not a fighter I'm a lover (Moe pokes Joe in eye) Joe (turns
to Larry) Did you see that he's always poking with the fingers etc. Moe, Hey
Lover Boy - Joe (turns) oh so you finally recognized me etc - Moe, I said lover boy not
blubber boy, Moe (yelling at Larry) Hey - Hey you, you with the Toni home permanent.
Larry (crossing Joe stepping up to Moe) I do my hair with Lestod, Moe (To Larry) Well
Tell me Les - Larry (Pointing to Joe) This is Toil Joe I'm not toil Im Mr Clean
Larry (To Joe) You look like the whole bottle, Moe (puts his arms under Larry's
and wipes his hands all over Larrys face.) Larry - Whats this? Moe - This is Handy Andy.
Moe (to Larry) whats your name Lad - Larry - My name is Tex - Moe Oh youre
from Texas? Larry no Im from Louisiana, but I don't want anyone to call
me Louise! - Moe (Smacks Larry and pulls him across by the Hair) Joe (to Moe) - wait a
minute Larry happens to be a friend of mine so you leave him alone see (sticks
his face up close to Moe), Moe - (Bops (Joe on the head and Bops Larry on
his shoulder.) Joe - Boy that was a double header whop, whop etc - Moe (To Joe)
what do you boys do - (Larry (to Moe) what are you saying? Moe (to Larry I said
what do you boys do? Larry - Comedy, Singing, Dancing, Park your car,
songwriting etc - Moe (To Joe) Hey Knucklehead (Pointing at Larry) Is he your
brother? Joe no my brother's living (Joe Laughs) Moe Hits Joe in Belly
oh oh oh hey you just hit me in the muscles! Moe Muscles? Joe yeah right
in the muscles - Moe you mean I hit you in the Jello - Joe yeah my Jello
muscles (Joe Laughs) Moe Hits Joe in the belly again - Moe (To Larry) Did I
hear you say you were song writers - Joe (to Moe) (Taking song out of Pocket)
Here's a little song we whipped up this morning - Moe (Taking Music) You
whipped it up -- -- Looks like you beat it to death! Is it good - written Rotten etc - (To Joe) Id like
to hear a few notes if you dont mind - Joe - sure Ill show you how it goes
(2)
Joe (sings) (High + loud) I have - - - Moe - Boy Ill say you have (or Frog in throat) - - Whats
wrong with the Larynx - Joe Larynx? Moe The pipes, the pipes. Joe Pipes?
Moe- yeh Pipes what have you got running from the Kitchen sink to the Bathroom?
Joe oh - Roaches - Moe - (Pokes Joe in eyes.) Larry - (Give me that (takes song from Joe)
you're singing it all wrong - you have to start up on the top here on Paganini
- - - - Moe - Paganini? Larry - yeah right here (Points) Paganini! Moe Thats
Page-nine! (Larry sings Do [?] gag - Point at Joe, he's standing on my right toe, shoves Joe give me that I'll show you how to sing this number -
Larry
wait a minute (tough like) Do you know the Liericks? Moe - The Liericks?
Joe Yeah (tough like) + How about the Rhythim, Do you the Rhythim of the song?
Moe The Liericks (looking at Larry) and the Rhythim (looks at Joe) Joe years!
Moe No I'll sing my own arrangement on this (sings) Last night Nellie wore
a brand new dress (Bass note) (to Joe) See right from the diaphram! - Joe Thats
whats wrong you're singing from the frying pan. It take a high note
singer (explains) not a low note singer (explains) Like this (Joe sings, Last nite Nelly
wore a brand new dress (Sings tremendously high note) Moe Thats good I like it,
I dont know why but I like it - Joe I don't know either but I like you too (To
audience) He's a nice guy sometimes (Kisses Moe) Larry - which one of you guys
does the cooking? - Moe (slaps Larry) (and looking at him calls) Hey Porcupine
whats your racket Kid? Larry Racket? etc - Moe I mean what do you
work at, How do you earn money do buy a Robert Hall reject like youre
wearing there, what are you - a chicken thief - a spy for the intelligence service
what do you do? Larry Im a tailor! Moe - oh a needle worker! Larry sure
you know I can make you a beautiful suit, a coat with 2 lapohells
a belt in the back and 2 pair of pants all for 475.00 - Moe $475.00?
youre no tailor - youre a robber! Larry Thats me Robber Tailor
Moe (smacks him) (turn to Joe) Hey Elliot Ness! Hey Lone Ranger - Hey
Tonto! - Joe (walking towards Moe) Kee Moe Sabbie, Keeee Moe Savvee,
Moe I'm sorry I dont Saveee! Joe - Well dont worry about it, neither
does Keemoe (Joe laughs) Moe smacks him in stomach Joe Hey Moe
do me a favor will you from now on hit me on the head will you
- Moe What for - Joe I wanna trade an upset
stomach for a head ache Joe laughs (Hit in stomach) Moe Hey Curly Joe what is your vocation
Joe I dont get you - Moe I dont want you. - Larry I don't need you!
Moe (to Joe) I said what is your vocation? -- Joe oh the last 2 weeks
in September - Moe - I see - Joe I always go fishing + take my kid brother - Moe- why?
(3)
Joe - He's got worms (Joe Laughs) Moe (hits Joe in Belly)
Moe I mean what do you work at - Joe oh I don't work Im an Inventor -- R.R. [?] ?
Moe (To Larry) Hey rag map! Whats wrong with the fisherman
he's got his sinkies twisted! Larry I'm also an [?] - [?] [?] pants. oh he's a little bit crazy
He thinks hes a chicken! Moe He thinks he's a chicken? Why
dont you send him to the ranch - Larry oh no, we need the
eggs. Moe (smacks Larry) Larry cut the act its now Poetry Time!
Moe oh Poetry time? Go right ahead! Larry Mary had a little
cat its foot was black with soot and into Mary's Bowl of milk
his sooty footy Put! Moe why dont you get lost shakespeare?
Joe (yells) Poetry time, Poetry time. Moe - you have a poem
Joe yes I have a poem for all the - - here. Mary had a little
lamb its fleece was white as snow - (very fast) etc. Moe (Hand
over Joes mouth)(Joe continues) Moe (hand over mouth again)
Thats the way to recite a poem (Moe mimicks Joe fast) Joe - Hey
thats very funny, but I couldnt understand a word you said? (Joe mimicks Moe)
Moe - I did it that way to show you how wrong you are
When you recite a poem, you just don't run off with the
words, take it nice and slow, give it a little shading
iambic tetrameter. Joe oh you mean I was reciting too
fast. - Moe take it easy - and above all when you recite
a poem - you must always recite with gestures - Joe I
don't know what you mean recite with gestures - Moe
I'll show you exactly what I mean, with the same poem
Joe okay I'll watch you etc - Moe The same poem with
gestures - Mary had a little lamb - you place your hands behind
(does so) Its fleece was white as snow - you place hands
in front (he does) And everywhere that Mary went - you place
your hands behind (he does so) The lamb was sure to go - you
place your hands in front (he does so) and so on and so forth
down to the end of the poem - Joe I can do that - with gestures
(He repeats down to punch line) (Boys general ad lib) Larry - Quiz time
Moe oh Quizz time? Joe Hollers quiz time, Quiz time (Boys look at Joe)
Larry (To Moe) Why does a traffic light turn red - Moe I dont know
why does a traffic light turn Red? Larry - you'd turn red too if
you had to stop + go in the middle of the street - (Moe looks daggers at Larry
Moe (yells) Quiz time Joe (repeats) Quiz time! Moe - Curly Joe I
have a Quiz for you. Joe a quiz for me oh boy maybe I'll win
(4)
something. - Moe Yeah a rap on the skull - Joe you mean I gotta
win it? okay Moe whats the quiz. Moe Tell me Curly Joe, why
are Fire engines always painted Red - Joe (Repeats) you gotta figure that
out lemme see - Newspapers are Red too (Boys react) 2 + 2 are four
8 + 4 is twelve (Boys react) 12 inches is a ruler, Queen Mary was
a ruler (Boys react) Queen Mary is also a ship that sails the seas -
there's fishes in the seas (Boys react) The fishes have finns the finns
are next to the Russians, The Russians are Red, Fire engines are
always Rushin, Thats why Fire engines are always painted
Red (Boys react) Joe (to Moe) you you thought I was stupid
Moe Now Im sure of it! Drama Time! Larry Drama Time?
(To Joe) Getta load of that high class nit wit with the spittoon
hair cut - Hey Curly Joe give him some high words! Joe
Elevator, sky, moon, stars - - - (Moe Bops Joe) Moe all right I'll
make it more simple, we'll do the drama, a sequal to that
wonderful motion picture - Pillow Talk called Father cut
your toenails you're tearing all the sheets -- (Moe takes part from Pocket)
(To Joe) oh Curly Joe I have a wonderful sketch here written
by a friend of mine. A Poet he used to be a butcher, He calls
for a character in this sketch that must look like a double Blob
Joe A double Blob- thats a big fat sloppy guy - where we
gonna find a big fat sloppy - - - (Joe looks at himself and at Moe)
Moe (To Joe) Hya Blob. Joe - (waves half heartedly) What is it
a musical comedy like my Fair Lady? Moe oh no - Joe Like
The Music Man? Moe oh no this is a highly dramatic sketch
like (Moe gives sample) Joe oh no I never do dramatic sketches Im
a musical comedy man I sing like. (He sings)(This old man until
Moe (yells) shut up. (Larry + Joe) Moe (yells at Joe) Hey nuk nack (Joe comes on)
Moe (as Joe comes over)(Joe holding out hand) Pick out 2 Paddy whacks.
Joe (Looks at Moes hand) I'll take this one and that one! Moe
(Pokes him in eyes) (Joe (To Moe) Youve poked me for the last time
you're nothing but a bully -- Okay lets see how tough you are?
(makes line) (step over the line -- come on step over the line -- Moe (To Larry)
Is that knucklehead talking to me - Joe yeah Im talking to you --
you with the shaggy dog hair cut -- step over come on! Moe (steps over)
Joe See now youre on my side
(5)
Moe (Pokes Joe in eyes) - Larry - (Mimicks) Pick out 2 Paddy wacks he
dont know angel puss is just waiting for him (Moe is looking at Larry all
the time) Moe (To Larry) Take the part! Larry (does a Cagney and
Moe belts him) Larry one more hit like that
and you're going to the Hospital. Moe yeah to visit you.
Larry (Takes Part) Moe - Gladys, Gladys, not here she deceived
me she promised to meet me at the old bridge at 10'oclock, its now
half past eight + shes not here yet (Looks at watch) - Curly Joe - what does your
watch say - Joe It don't say anything you have to look at (Poke in eye)
Moe With Gladys as my wife and those papers in my possession I can
laugh at the world - Joe (Laughs) Moe Hey. chuk, chuk, chuk you wanna lay
an egg get over in the corner - Joe (starts to go turns back) wait a minute - How
can a big guy like me lay an egg - Larry - Theres a big basket over there (Moe [?])
Moe How the wind blows! Larry (makes wind
noise and gets a backhanded slap) Curses on that fellow Jack Manly
he stands between me and the woman I love, but she'll be mine yet -- How
it thunders (Larry pays no attention Moe repeats) How it Thunders - Larry
(makes phony noise with spitting) Joe Its a good thing you didnt ask for
rain. Joe laughs, fingers Moe - Movie Time - Larry you
ought to be in pictures, youre uglier than me! (Moe shoves him) Joe (To Larry)
There's no Lady uglier than you - you're the head ugg!
(Sees Moe) Oh my director (+ bows)
(Gets a klunk under the forehead) Moe (Blows hair, Joe pats hair down with
dialouge) Moe Thank you very much (Pats Joes head) Sounds like an empty
watermelon -- Pay me the 50,000 or Ill foreclose the mgto you rat (Moe laughs)
(Moe Smacks Joe) Larry (Pulls Joe aside) I will not pay you the money (Pulls
Joe Back) (Joe Bumps Belly to Belly with Moe) (Turns to look at Paper)(Moe Pulls Joe
back by the nose) - Moe you have cold son - (Moe blows hair again) Joe
speaks some dialouge and says) I'll nail it down - Moe Oh did you bring some nails?
Joe I've got a tack here (Pulls tack out of mauve coat and hammers it into Moes head)
Moe ouch - hold this (gives Joe paper) Grabs Joe by nose + hits with fist Moe
Pay me the 50,000 or Ill forclose the mget you viper - Ha Ha Ha - Ho Ho Ho + a couple of He Hes
Joe Ill take a small he he (Moe smacks him) Joe - For goodness sakes will
you pay him the money. (Swanee River + Dance finish) (you like an untoucha[word cut off] Hey Elliot Ness!
Encore
(6)
Encore (To Ray)
(2nd bow bump) - Joe (Bowls Larry out) Moe anytime a
truck like you stops in the middle of traffic make a signal
Joe Im sorry my tail light was out ? Hit in stomach
Moe I'll knock your head lights out (Pushs hair back)
Joe - Its real - Larry (Pulls Moes hair) Moe Thank you
very much ladies + gentlemen, thank you for coming +
thank you for your wonderful response. We have heard
that on many occasions that some of you folks are being
disturbed around the dinner hour, serving the children in the
living room, tossing milk + crackers into the bedroom - - - at
least you're getting 15 or 20 minutes of quite, Let the youngsters
watch these odd characters, no harm and theres nothing like
a childs laughter, after all these are the youngsters who brought
us out of vertual retirement + dragged us right up to the top again
(Applaud the kids) Now you've been watching this character
acting the part of a baffoon up here for the past half hour
actually he is a post graduate - - - Larry of Post Toasties. -
Moe actually he is a Post Graduate of M.I.T. - Mass. institute of
Truck Drivers, But what the Public does not generally know is that
He has majored in sociology, he has delved deeply into the
Problem of juvenile delinquency and he feels that he has this
problem partially solved, I am certain that he has some vital
comments to make on this subject. I want you now to meet +
greet Proffessor - Vladinar Cushing Brust -- -- Jr. (Joe with bowling gag)
And now Id like you to gaze upon the character on my
Right -- -- I'm tired of looking at him -- but will give the devil
his due, this lad too is a graduate of a very fine university in [?]
they asked me not to mention the name. This lad had the
unmitigated gaul to take the most difficult course of all - - a
6 year course in mumbling. It is tremendously difficult because at the
beginning of the course they put 6 marbles in your mouth and at the
end of each year they withdraw a marble and when youve
lost all your marbles this is it. - - Now I give you - - and your
can have, Doctor Bradbury Ingerzaman Curd - Larry - - [?]
the first thing in the morning, and now the Proffessor with a head like
a dirty tennis ball and the doctor who combs his hair with an egg beater
join with me in saying - May God Bless you + keep you I wish we could afford to"